OK Glee Spoilers fans, the Spring Premiere is only two days away! Can you feel the rush of excitement? The relief that the long separation is almost over? The intense dread that they've screwed everything up even worse than it already was? The mind-numbing fear that they may have decided just to let Blaine sing all the parts of all the songs, including the duets and the group numbers, without giving him a single spoken line?
Yeah, me, too. Still, we know that Matt Bomer has arrived to give Blaine a Big Brother who is an even more obnoxious attention whore than he is so that they can wallow in Deeply Affecting Angst and sibling rivalry. The Official Glee Promo for Big Brother is now available, and it appears that Cooper's method acting involves striking more poses than Madonna. Watch the Sneak Peek for Big Brother.
We have an official song list for the episode now:
I'm Still Standing by Elton John - Quinn (So she's alive, but I am not sure she's technically accurate.)
Rio/Hungry Like the Wolf by Duran Duran - Blaine and Cooper
Fighter by Christina Aguilera - Blaine (Reportedly wet and shirtless. He gets hospitalized over a slushie, but he's a fighter in the shower, folks.)
Up, Up, Up by Givers - Artie and Quinn sing at the skate park
Somebody That I Used to Know by Goyte - Blaine and Cooper... (wait, didn't they just sing? You know, for guys who aren't getting along, they sure collaborate a lot.)
So Blaine's not singing every song in the episode. Just... more than half. Who does he think he is, Rachel? Listen to the songs for Big Brother. In other news, we learn that Puck has been in High School for five years, so he is indeed older than everybody else. I knew it. Of course, I still think he skipped for five years after Jr. High School before enrolling as a Freshman, which would explain a great deal.
Possibly the biggest news is that there will be no more hiatus. We've got eight new episodes, in a row, eight new opportunities for serious snark, and then all the interesting student characters played by people with acting talent will be written into some mysterious and impossible future the producers can't tell us about yet. This is because they don't know if it's actually going to work or not. I feel like a loved one is on life support and I don't know if it's going to live or die. Futhermore, it's in this coma because Ryan Murphy can't stop talking any more than Quinn could stop texting.
OK... eight weeks until the end of Glee as we know it. Let's enjoy the ride, snarking all the way.